Newly Wedded…Again

It was just 8 am when I heard the distant screams, cursing, and a whip landing on someone. I believed my neighbor was flogging her daughter and I had no interest in watching as I had more interesting things to do. I was reading comics online, so even with the screams and people saying “it’s okay na” I wasn’t interested in what was going on and had no plans of leaving that spot for any reason. I was successful till I heard a familiar voice yell “ I have warned her and petted her but she wouldn’t listen now I have to teach her a lesson”, that was when I knew what was going on. Our other neighbor was beating his wife for the fourth time in four days. I quickly dropped my phone, wore my glasses, and went to the balcony to see what was going on. I could see him using a cane to flog her as she lay on the floor screaming at the top of her lungs while several people stood watching and shaking their heads.

Unfortunately for me and my 5’5 body, the plantain trees in front of my house didn’t quite allow me to get a good view of what was going on so I decided to go downstairs where the view was in 3d.

Downstairs, I could see more people were watching. Old and young men and women, children, passer by, family members, everyone was watching and murmuring among themselves. My uncle saw me and asked amidst a chuckle “ did you come to see the show?”. I laughed and just watched.

To them, this was their life. A couple fighting in the street over God knows what. To everyone else, they were a show. A mere distraction from whatever boring task you were engaging in and a topic for discussion.

I watched them, a young “couple” fighting in public over what no one knew. He, probably in his mid-thirties, and she, not over twenty-two, were the show everyone was keen to see. Some shook their heads, others murmured about warning the girl about marrying him, others like me just watched in silence. This was my second time watching them fight as I have only been here a month and I’m always preoccupied with what was happening on my phone than outside it. The first time, I was shocked to see him beat her so publicly, ruthlessly, and with no signs of love. They’ve only been married for a little over a month and this was shocking to me. The second and third time they fought I minded my business and didn’t bother coming to watch as it ended as quickly as it started. This was the fourth time and I was no longer surprised. I felt pity towards her but at the same time wondered which she needed more, pity or saving.

No one interfered, no one held him back, not even when he lifted a big stick and hit her severally on the leg or when he slapped her across the face or when he would fling her vigorously on the floor for charging at him. Everyone just watched, waiting for it to end.

She wasn’t his first wife but the eighth one and he wasn’t her first husband but the second one. “He had started courting her while she was pregnant and living with her first husband,” the rumor mongers said. “he was going to her ex-husband’s house to see her whenever her husband went to work. They were having an affair but her ex-husband had no idea. A few months after she gave birth to her baby, she left her husband who allegedly had done nothing wrong to her, and moved in with this new man”. He had gone to her people to pay her “bride price” so traditionally, she is now his wife” my uncle’s wife said. “That’s terrible. Leaving your husband and taking his child too with no prior warning and going off with another man and your baby is just a few months old” I said in disbelief. “The worst part is, she knew his history with women, all seven of them had suffered the same fate in his hands. “He marries them, gets them pregnant, physically abuses them at any slight provocation till they get fed up, and leaves with the child/children while he brings in another woman to continue his tradition. The last one, he brought her in while her predecessor was still living with him” she added.

I watched the girl as she cried, cursed, and fell to the ground whenever he pushed her. Her body was thin and frail and I knew it was as a result of malnutrition. She was tall and dressed in clothes so worn out no one could guess the original colors. He was an average height, good-looking, light-skinned man. “ she left her husband for a fine boy that will be beating her” my mum said.

“Last week, she told him she was hungry and he replied “did you come into this marriage to eat?” another person quickly added.

“Why did she leave her ex-husband? This man is poorer than her ex-husband so it’s obviously not because of money, he is violent while her ex-husband allegedly isn’t. Could it be because of sex? what kind of sex will make anyone willingly put her life in danger?” I wondered.

“I married you with my money and you must learn to bow to me. Go back to your village and ask your people how they marry over there. As long as I married you with my money, I can do whatever I want with you and you must never talk back at me” he kept barking at her.

I laughed and shook my head. Now I knew why no one was interfering and it was sad. First, they have watched him do this over and over again to different women and have completely given up on helping or advising him as it never helped. Secondly, they believed marriage gave men the liberty to do whatever they wanted to their wives. I remember her raising a stick to ward him off after about an hour of him mercilessly beating her. He backed off and moved away from her for a moment while she waved the stick in the air and threatened to hit him with it if he comes back to beat her again. “You had this stick the whole time and you didn’t use it to hit him on his head since” I yelled. My uncle looked up at me in surprise and said “ah ah you’re wicked o”

Now I got mad. We all have been watching this man beat her for days but at the mere thought of her hitting him back, it is now seen as wickedness? This man sells firewood, that place is littered with different sticks and he had been beating her since and she just did nothing other than shout and rain curses on him? Why didn’t she pick up one of the sticks lying around and just hit him right back? An eye for an eye.

I was livid.

“ If I were her, I’ll just pack my bags and leave. Once I leave, he can’t beat me anymore, marriage is not by force” my 9-year-old sister said innocently.

At that age, she knew leaving was the best and only option in situations like this.

I couldn’t help but imagine how my friends would willingly fight any man that decides to turn my body into a talking drum. Even if I can handle myself, I wouldn’t deny myself the pleasure of hearing the sounds of different hands hitting his skin while he screams in pain. Music to my ears.

“The worst part is, she is now pregnant for him,” my uncle’s wife said.

She is pregnant? All these beatings and hitting while she is pregnant? She could lose her unborn child and also her life?

“What about her baby?” I inquired.

“She gave the baby to her mother as she couldn’t be in a new marriage with a child from her previous marriage,” my uncle’s wife said.



This revelation made me feel sad for her baby. Just a few months old and you’re already separated from your mother.

“aaaaaarrrrgh” I heard her scream again and I turned to see her on the floor motionless. Her husband had hit her leg with a stick and she fainted. He dragged her unconscious pregnant body into his small shop, locked her inside, and left with the key. We all just stood and watched.

I wonder what beautiful promises he must have given her while she cheated on her husband with him. The beautiful things he must have whispered in her ears or the delicious fried meat they must have shared that made her feel the love with him would be just as sweet.

I hope she leaves, corrects her mistakes, maybe her ex-husband will forgive her and take her back, maybe not, let her save her life because that’s all that needs saving now. In the end, “marriage is not by force” in the words of my sister.

She fainted today, what will happen tomorrow?